Responding to support someone at work

Noticing changes in a person’s behaviour is one way to act early and provide support. Not everyone will reach out for help when they need it. These actions can help you reach out and provide support if required. 

Finding the right time and place

Find a private place to talk, away from other people in the workplace. Choose a good time when neither of you is rushed.

It is best to allow for more time than expected, just in case you want to keep talking or need to arrange professional support. Allowing extra time also lets the other person gather their thoughts after the conversation if they need.

Having the conversation

• Start by mentioning the behaviour you have observed lately that has made you concerned. For example, “I’ve noticed that you’ve been quiet lately. How are you?”
• Use open ended questions to encourage the person to talk: “How are you feeling?”, “What can I do to help?” If the person is reluctant to talk, ask a few questions but also allow them privacy if this is not something they wish to discuss right now.  
• Avoid making judgements about their behaviour (e.g. “You shouldn’t be so moody”) or minimise their concerns (e.g. “Don’t stress—you don’t have anything to worry about”). These may feel like criticisms or a lack of acceptance. 
• If appropriate, share similar experiences in your life and how you worked through them (normalise the situation)
• Be aware of cultural sensitivities that may relate to mental ill-health. (Read more here.)
• If someone shows that they do not wish to talk, or they say they do not need support, it is important to show respect and openness to a conversation in future. (Find out more in the stigma module.) Shift the conversation to other topics and mention that they can talk to you if they want in future. 
• Be mindful that this can be difficult conversation for an individual, and they may feel distressed during the conversation. If someone is displaying signs of getting distressed, it is important to hold the space for the individual but also consider reverting back to an earlier topic. 

You can help someone experiencing mental ill-health by asking them if they are okay. They may not want to talk yet, but asking if they are okay lets them know you care. 

Active listening

• Ensure you really listen to the person; avoid interrupting and give them time to talk. 
• Recognise people may wish to keep some information private. You do not need to ask for all the details of what is happening. You can be guided by what they are willing to share in that moment. 
• Allow for silences. Pauses give people space to think and find the right words. 
• Resist the temptation to jump to findings solutions. Sometimes, people just need to be heard. 
• If someone does want your advice, work through potential solutions together by asking questions such as “What do you think will help?”
• To show that you are listening, try paraphrasing what someone shares back to them, so they can clarify understanding and feel heard.

Seeking further help

Encourage them to talk to their GP or another health professional if they need help. Make sure they are aware of the types of help available in work and outside of work. Providing a list of the services on the Urgent Help page can help.

Understand what services are available

Knowing what services are available within your workplace or externally can help you if you are suggesting options for support.

Encourage the person to talk to their GP or another health professional if they need help. Make sure they are aware of the types of help available at work and outside of work. Providing a list of the services on the Urgent Help page can help.

You can help someone experiencing mental ill-health by encouraging them to get help. It could be their GP, a counsellor (e.g. through an Employee Assistance Program) or an organisation you can find through Head to Health. 

Following up

Follow up by speaking to the person again (e.g. a week later). Genuinely thank them for talking with you and check in on how they are now and any steps they might have taken.

If following up with that person might be challenging (e.g. they travel across multiple site locations), see whether they are comfortable if other people checked in on them later. Remember to only share information with that person’s permission.

In a crisis situation

If you are concerned for someone’s immediate safety:

• Encourage the person to stay with you until they are no longer showing distress or other support arrives; stay with them. 
• An individual in distress may not be thinking clearly and so asking them a lot of questions can be challenging for them. It is important to remain calm and patient. Move slowly in the conversation.
• Ask the person who might be best for you to call—e.g. a family member, their friend, a carer or the person’s doctor. Make the call and tell them about the situation and see if they can come to where the person is and support the person to access professional services. 
• You, or a co-worker, manager or friend, can also drive the person to a hospital emergency department. They may be able to see a health professional quickly who can assess the situation and provide recommendations about what is required next.  
• In an emergency, call 000 and stay with the person until emergency services arrive.
• Some states have mental health crisis lines that can help people connect with relevant crisis services. Having these numbers on hand means you can call these services together to discuss what options are available. 

When a person is in crisis or very distressed, other people in the nearby vicinity might be also be impacted. Consider how you can assist others who may be exposed to also protect their mental health. 

If you are worried about someone's safety, call 000.

After the conversation

Sometimes, it can be challenging to know what to say after you have supported someone at work. Here are some tips for following up after a conversation:

• Have empathy for the person’s situation; try to understand what has been happening for them and how it might be impacting their life. Even if there are occasions where you may not ‘agree’ with the person, it is important to acknowledge their reality, and their feelings as the truth, by showing compassion and empathy about what they are expressing. 
• Ask them what would be most helpful for them right now—and is that something you can assist with. 
• Be mindful of not asking too many questions because this can be difficult to answer when not feeling yourself. 
• Let them know that you are happy to listen in future. 
• Pick up a previous topic of conversation or start a conversation about something topical to signal that you are not treating them differently. 
• Discuss some options for including them in things at work to help them keep connected with the workplace and their co-workers.
• Respect their right to not engage in further conversation with you. They may be seeking support but do not want to keep you informed. Your responsibility is the conversation and not the outcome.